Thanksgiving Family Conflict – and How to Avoid It
November 15, 2018
As you all know, Thanksgiving is coming up soon: November 22nd. This means we will be heading off to Thanksgiving break. Stores will start putting out turkeys, cranberries, pies, sweet potatoes, and stuffing. Family comes to town as well. Though the holiday is exciting with the food and fun, you also have to deal with the racist, sexist, or stuck up grandparents that you haven’t seen since you were 5, political uncles not afraid to say their opinions, and small slightly annoying cousins that come with it. While the holiday is approaching quickly, the awkward, boring, rude and even sarcastic questions and conversations come too. Some conversations may or may not cause some horrible disagreements between families. To avoid possibly embarrassing conversations, follow these tips:
Politics
With the voting season upon us, at the dinner table there’s always that “one uncle” that’s not afraid to tell the entire family who he voted for and why he voted for them. He’s also willing to argue with someone over who won the election. Everyone has their own opinions on politics, and it’s better not to bring it up because otherwise people will have different opinions and start to argue.
Money
Most of the time, money is a subject that comes up during dinner. There’s that family member that talks about how rich they are, how much their dream house costs, or even that they spent so much on a divorce! Money is never a great subject to talk about because of the arguments it causes. It can’t buy happiness so why even bring it up?
Family gossip and drama
Nobody likes gossip or drama, especially if it’s about them. If you have something mean to say, dont say it! No matter if it’s something small, something true, or something you just heard around the neighborhood. Anything can start a heated argument or even trigger someone, even if it’s the tiniest thing. If this comes up, just change the subject.
Relationships
Families always want to know how you are with your relationships. Sometimes it can get awkward with all of the questions they ask. But it the end, they just want to know how your love life is going, even if they get to be too personal. The best way to ask about relationships is to not even ask at all.
Awkward life questions
Family members that you never see always ask questions to find out about your life. They are always dying to know if you have a job or if you’re even going to college. Young people get pressured a lot with these; sometimes family doesn’t agree with you on your job choice or your choice to go to college or not. They think they are allowed to choose your life for you, but that’s not the case. You’re still young, don’t let the pressure get to you. It’s your life and you choose what to do with it even if it’s not what the others want.
Questions to avoid at all costs
- So, why aren’t you married/when are you getting married?
- When am I getting grandchildren?
- When/why are you moving out?
- Why are you still single?
- Are you pregnant?
- Have you gained/lost weight?
- So…the election?
- What are your plans for the future?
Nobody likes these questions. It can make them feel awkward, angry or even embarrassed.
Avoid these questions if you want a perfect family dinner.
Questions and stories to bring up
- Fun childhood memories/stories. Everyone has at least one fun childhood memory, whether it’s with siblings, grandparents, parents, pets, friends or even a fun day or adventure by yourself.
- Funny stories. Every family has a funny story they tell every year. Even though you’ve heard it 3 thousand times, you still get a good laugh out of them.
- Recipes. We all have a favorite Thanksgiving recipe. we all have one. Discuss some of your favorite recipes so you can make them at home.
Even though Thanksgiving sometimes can be awkward, it’s still better than nothing. Enjoy your time with your family.